IS THAT WHAT THE KIDS ARE DOING THESE DAYS?

So… Snapchat? Is this a thing now? Apparently this is a thing. Either I’m the most boring person on the planet (highly doubtful), or I’m so incredibly out of touch with the youths of today (slightly probable), because I can’t bring myself to use Snapchat. Snapchat

Don’t get me wrong. “I’m down, I’ve got the 411…” <– Know this reference, or perish. Facebook I can handle. I’ve even been known to tweet on occasion. Pinterest is addictive, I’m (sort of) on the Instagram & Tumblr gives me hives. But Snapchat? Snapchat is a whole ‘nother animal.

Let’s face it, even with us millenials there’s a generation gap. I’ve been repeatedly asked to join the Snapchat ranks and I would… except I feel like I have absolutely nothing to (snap)chat about. I also just don’t feel like documenting every minute of my life. And with all the privacy issues out there, I don’t really need to have my random life choices captured (because you can capture images – there’s an app for that) and played back to me in a future date. And I definitely do not wish for a 6-sec shot of anyone’s genitalia over my morning cuppa. (I heard that was a thing). Maybe it’s a control issue. It’s probably a control issue. It’s definitely a control issue. Hence the gen gap.

It’s also a bit of an introvert thing. If I want to talk to you, I’ll talk to you. Or text. Or send you a picture. The regular way. I will print off copies from my disposable camera at the CVS & send it through the mail. The regular mail. Not the electronic kind. Okay, maybe the electronic kind. It is 2015 after all. For those of you who don’t know, a disposable camera... 

What do you think? Should I succumb to the pressure of the Snapchat or resist the requests?

Until then…

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STATE OF THE UNION: AMERICA, WE GOT THIS

SOTU meme

It’s that time of year again. When the president polarizes the nation and provides countless memes for the coming year. Regardless of your politics, everyone can appreciate a good meme.

SOTU meme

I’m loving Obama at this year’s address. After a self-satisfied wink about eight minutes in, he proceeded to give zero-fucks about red versus blue, Democrat versus Republican, and demanded more respect for the American people through bi-partisan support. Because that’s where it’s all about. Government for the people.

And here’s to hoping that the promises of aid for student loan debt will finally be fulfilled. And that the guv’ment will stay out of my uterus.  And maybe we can finally move toward alleviating the crippling, bigoted ignorance that plagues our nation and focus on the betterment of our country through “better politics”. Come on America. Get your shit together. Bi-partisan sharing is caring, because it benefits the American people. “It’s what the American people want. It’s what the American people deserve.” – Barack Obama, SOTU 2015

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ALL AGENTS ARE STILL ASSISTING OTHER CUSTOMERS; YOUR CALL IS VERY IMPORTANT TO US

Spot-of-Tea

As I write this post, I will have been on hold for a record THREE HOURS AND TWENTY-SIX MINUTES with the Illinois Health Department while this tinny music plays the same EIGHT bars over and over and over and over and…

I figured that it would take a while to get this health coverage sorted but a three hour hold time is a bit ridiculous. I feel like I’ve gone out for the three hour tour and ended up on Gilligan’s Island. Ugh. That show was the WORST. It wasn’t even funny and I always wanted to punch Gilligan in the face. You know what is funny? This:

 I literally lol’ed. Way to miss out, Fallon.

So glad I’m off work today. Hope your day is going… well, just going anywhere, really. As for me, I’ll continue to hold.

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#BYE2014

You may (or may not) have noticed that random elouise has been on a brief hiatus. This year of blogging – my first, mind you – was spotty dog at best, but it was great to get my toe into the water. But last year’s resolution was to start a blog and by golly, here it is! Just over a year old! *tear* They grow up so fast! And as the remnants of 2014 sink into the past, becoming coloured by nostalgia where we all know everything was better (back in the day, uphill in the snow, both ways – and don’t even get me started on the music you kids are listening to these days), I fight the urge to be a part of the New Year resolution suck-fest. Already six days into the new year and if I have to hear, “This is the year of _____!” Imma hurt somebody. Seriously. Get outta here with that mess. #ByeFelicia. Here’s some unsolicited advice: don’t sign up for that gym membership. You know you’re never gonna go. Just get a dog. They like walks and I’m sure they’d be more than happy to take you along.

I’ve made some “resolutions” that mostly fall under the category of GETTING SHIT DONE (CONSISTENTLY). That pretty much sums it up, don’t you think? It’s basically BEING A RESPONSIBLE ADULT. Because that’s what I am. (I think).

So I’m back on the blog because I’ve got stuff to say and y’all know you want to hear it!

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P.S. It’s also worth noting that I haven’t lost my touch for a good old fashioned mixed metaphor or hyperbole. You’re welcome y’all.